I woke up early one morning and headed to church to pray in the silence of sleeping city. The sky was still dark and my senses were heightened. Perhaps it was the beating heart that captured my mind, but I was suddenly struck with fear, a general apprehension. After searching through what murky pool of my heart, I found the source of my anxiety. It was the question not of God's infinite power in saving people, but of God's decision to choose me in His salvation. I know in my mind that God can raise people up from the dead, but I did not know if He would save me from the dead. With quiet outcries, I knew I would find the source of comfort only in the Bible.
Romans 8:38-39 says "For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Unconditionally conditional, conditionally unconditional. Such seems to be God's love for us, but nonetheless, I chose to believe that this love was indeed for me, one that is not quite there yet seeking. Perhaps God will teach me more as I grow mature.
"Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!" Psalm 27:14
I shall never know fully until that day comes, of God's coming. With what time I have here in this life though, I will be diligent in learning of His love truly.
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