Dream Sequence: #646523

1
I married a friend at church. I moved in to her house, an American suburban house to two stories. Though in real life, she had no brother, her brother was living in the same house as well. I woke up next to her in bed, and I was filled with joy of having been married. I got up to do house chores as my wife began to do the dishes. I insisted on doing it myself, but she refused. I found her truly nice, almost to the point where I felt sorry that I was not as kind.

That moment, I realized that I had a girlfriend. I had not told her that I got married. I had not told my wife that I had a girlfriend. I began to wish to turn back time to undo what I had done to myself, and soon realized that it was all a dream.

2
I found myself in a playground, though rather a playground swimming pool. My dad and I had come to enjoy the water, and there was a mother and a son hanging out by the playground. A long floating mat was present, and I pushed it far and had let go, making a giant slide for my dad and the boy. The boy almost hurt himself, but managed to break the fall.

I was then trying to take a shower, but the shower place was far, while I needed to run across many people without my clothes on. I hesitated, but soon put on clothes to simply walk across.

As I left the pool, I got on a bus, of which I had thought to be a public bus. As the bus made a stop, I soon realized that it was a bus to a funeral. I had on a white dress shirt and black pants, which had me blend into the crowd. Realizing of my blunder, I escaped, and soon woke up from my dream.

God's Letter

Spirits shattered, all that mattered, lost,

as I look into my heart to see its last

moment of disposal, empty, a sum so hefty,

everything leaking out through the cracks, feel like a road kill along the tracks

so then, I ask why, why do I make myself a blank page?

I am that Bible, a piece of God’s handwriting. What say it when read?

What am I to show for in the presence of angels once in heaven?

The unleavened, bread is what I shall be, what is shattered is no longer to be

For all that I do, I show that I am a letter from Christ

Second Corinthians, Chapter Three Verse Three

so remember

Half past reminiscence

I am past half of my studies in medicine. A lot has changed since my first day. Physically, some, but more so mentally, or perhaps spiritually. I still remember hearing the sirens blare, getting startled, but soon realizing that such has become my life. I had struggled to keep up with the rigor of the academics, while trying desperately to hold onto myself. The busyness has settled down as I have started clinical rotations. I have seen patients and how they were treated. 

Perhaps it was the folktales of miraculous healing that had formed my ideas on being a doctor. Reality was none like it. Being a doctor was just being a scientist. There was nothing magical about medicine. It was nothing about life-giving, only perhaps prolonging. 

All my life, I have struggled with weakness, the human frailty. By becoming a doctor, I had thought I would be allowed to become more, fill the void of being human, correct the brokenness of mankind. It was still the grace of God.

I remember my friend telling me that the hospital building is no different than the tower of Babel. I quickly caught onto the idea as well. Though it may not be completely out of God's will, but it was war nonetheless. People struggled to hold onto life, trying to figure out the answer to death, while the hand of God constantly reaches out to let people know that He is the only salvation to death. 

The job of being a doctor was no different than any other occupation. We are still dependent fully on the Lord. Only through Him shall we ever see life seep in the doors of a hospital. 

Touch the Sky - Hillsong United

1

What fortune lies beyond the stars
Those dazzling heights too vast to climb
I got so high to fall so far
But I found heaven as love swept low

2
What treasure waits within Your scars
This gift of freedom gold can't buy
I bought the world and sold my heart
You traded heaven to have me again

C
My heart beating, my soul breathing
I found my life when I laid it down
Upward falling, spirit soaring
I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground

B
Find me here at Your feet again
Everything I am, reaching out, I surrender
Come sweep me up in Your love again
And my soul will dance
On the wings of forever

Humility Found

"Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests, but each of you to the interests of the others." Philippians 2:1-4

The trick to praying much is realizing that prayer answered is possibly the sweetest thing. I had been praying for humility for couple of weeks now, and this was His response. 

Amen