Cryings from 2014

I want to have this recorded before I forget tomorrow morning. My dad felt rather unloved, coming from a family of chaos pretty much. My mother had trauma and anger built inside of her from lots of life events. My family isn’t as Christian loving family as I thought they were. We’re a dysfunctional family. No wonder I’m a sociopath.

God, why do you show us perfection if we’re nowhere near it, if we’ll never be able to reach it?

I guess it doesn’t matter anymore though. Maybe perfection isn’t what we were here for, yet it is so favorable. It looks so appealing.

But I know, perfection only exists after this life, only with God. So I’ll wait. 

Here With Me

You have no reason to say with me.
Yet, here you are, right by my side.
All I can say is 'Grace.'
All I can wonder is 'Love.'

Starting Today

Of my few problems with the Bible is that there are few accounts of the dailies of life for the Christians in the old days, the daily life occurrences. Why is it that only the major events are recorded?

On second thought, that is a bad question. I guess textbooks of history answers that in itself.

Perhaps there are diaries of Christians of generations old, and I just haven’t been searching fervently.

I guess all of this just stems from one underlying question: How should I live the today?

Year-End Favorites

The year is coming to an end. As I was reading today's passage, I just wondered, would anyone name me in their letter, exalting God for the work He has shown through me? Would I be worthy or even have just made an impact in another's life enough to be mentioned in their lives?

"My fellow prisoner Aristarchus sends you his greetings, as does Mark, the cousin of Barnabas. (You have received instructions about him; if he comes to you, welcome him.) Jesus, who is called Justus, also sends greetings. These are the only Jews among my co-workers for the kingdom of God, and they have proved a comfort to me. Epaphras, who is one of you and a servant of Christ Jesus, sends greetings. He is always wrestling in prayer for you, that you may stand firm in all the will of God, mature and fully assured. I vouch for him that he is working hard for you and for those at Laodicea and Hierapolis. Our dear friend Luke, the doctor, and Demas send greetings. Give my greetings to the brothers and sisters at Laodicea, and to Nympha and the church in her house." Colossians 4:10-15

Fight for the Word

You need to battle for the Bible, kid.

You need to read until the Bible takes hold of you, rather you take hold of it.

You need to take care of it, for it is your heart. 

Shh

"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." Colossians 4:6

Shh. 
Stop with all the sex, power and money
Let your words flow like honey
Be mindful with your tongue
Lest you be shamed as you are young
Love is all you need to talk about
Make rain to end this graceless drought

A Prayer for Hardship

Lord, I have a request, please take it as you see fit.

I wish to troubled. I wish to be stretched beyond measure. I wish to encounter all the pain and sufferings that I can handle. I wish to be challenged. I wish to see how low my faith can go. I wish to see myself truly. 

Through it all, I wish to be a promise keeper. I wish to rise above all that you have set before me, and truly become what you have made me to be.